Saturday the 14th of April I went to Springfield, OR and ran the Biggest Loser 5K with My cousins Sandy & Angi, my Aunt Karen and some other friends of theirs. It was so much fun!  We decided to just start doing the races and eventually we will be running them! Hopefully one day marathons! As I was on the race course with the crowds of people all around. the thought went through my mind that this type of event would be ideal for some freak to let off a bomb. I actually thought about the Boston the next day..... It was horrifying to hear that 2 bombs went off at the Boston Marathon finish line killing 3 people and injuring well over 100. A friend/acquaintance of mine was at the race, less than a mile from the blast. What a horrific day! A sad day! Today they got the 2 very young guys responsible. This world can be a scary place! I always think about people in countries where this type of thing is more common and wonder how they ever left their homes! We are getting closer and closer to that here in our nation.

So the boat project became quite a family project. Even the cat enjoyed nice summer days watching the work be done. We havent been able to take her out on the water because of the fact that we dont have a truck..haha...3 boats and no truck! One day... This coming summer Larry will probably take it out with John or Joe...So here are the pics of the almost finished & finished boat. I am very proud of Larry, he does a great job with boat building and repair/restoration. 

She doesn't have a name yet, but she sure is a beauty! Larry was thinking "Coffee Mate" Which would be appropriate since he would probably do more coffee drinking than fishing on the thing! And his obsession for Coffee Mate French Vanilla is crazy!!! LOL Any suggestions?

Larry's summer project

If Larry doesnt have a project when he's home for summer, i simply go insane! He paces the floor and drives me crazy! When he has a project, he's outside all day, involves the kids, and the house is mostly all mine!!! With an exception of that crazy 21 yr old of mine that lives upstairs and always tries to trick me into cooking food for him!

So this summer's project is a new boat. Boat #3...we have no truck, we have no lake...but we have 3 boats!!!!

This boat was built by a little old guy who retired it. Larry is excited to restore it to it's youth and show they guy. Maybe he'll be up for a fishing trip....

After pics to follow....

San Jose del Cabo

Day 1

After the shock wore off that Larry's passport didn't arrive and I would be traveling alone until he could get here, i packed my bags with anticipation for the days to come. Cameron dropped me at the airport at 5:30 am, it was tough saying goodbye to him because I knew i was leaving all of my responsibilities on him. He volunteered to care for the kids and the house  but that burden along with full-time school is not light, so the mommy in me teared up. Not to mention the worry I had with all of the danger traveling to Mexico and me going alone.....so i got to my gate and waited. The woman across from me kept staring at me with a shitty look on her face. I dont know what she was thinking...maybe she didnt like fat people. On the plane i sat next to a young kid with an empty seat between. I was sad thinking Larry should be there:( It was really my seat, but i was hoping Larry's ticket hadn't sold and we could have some space. Finally a man came up and said, "I think that's my seat" i said, oh darn, it was going to be my husbands but he couldn't make it,he didnt get his passport..it's our 20 yr anniversary... ok" He said, i'm a stand by, i work for the airlines, there's a seat in the back I can take, I dont want to take the place of your husband" so nice! so the kid next to me started talking to me. He was from France, traveling alone all over the country and now was on his way to Montreal canada to accept a job. Hi dad lives in Greece, his mom in Morocco, or maybe the other way around. We chatted the whol flight ot San Francisco. He was a great kid. Before we parted he asked if he could have a mother's hug for he missed him mom desperately. Of course!
I had an hour to kill in San Fran. I enjoyed listening to the people over the intercom trying to pronounce all the foreign names! The bathroom were so small there, like 6 stalls and the lines were long. I hate pooping in public bathrooms, especially in that atmosphere. You could locate where the poop smell was coming from and had to walk out and face the crowd! I laughed sinisterly as i walked out of my stall.
On the flight into Mexico i had to sit in-between two guys. I apologized when i had to tell them i would be squishing in. One guy, aroung 65, window side, thought he was all that and a bag of chips! He flirted with me through the flight as I continually took his ego down a notch with every inappropriate thing he said. The kid on the isle, i think i may have seen him on America's most wanted. By the end of the trip we talked a lot and he was very nice. Traveling to meet up with his family for his sisters 30th birthday....or so he says....haha
I got to the airport, hopped ona  bus and came to Las Mananitas. I walked in the room and a smile a mile wide has been on my face ever since! So beautiful! It looks like it's right out of a James bond movie! for real!!!
I walked throu the villa, picked my room, got the internet going, chatted, then took a bath to sooth my weary body and soul. As I sat in the bubbly bath, i felt like a bride preparing for her groom. This time alone will be special and make Larry's arrival all the more.
I went to the Supermercado to get some groceries. It was 6 pm and I hadn't eaten at all. Two ploice officers asked me if they could buy me drinks...hello, some white people speak Spanish too dumb dumbs! They were pretty shocked when i gave them "the Look"

So i came back, climbed in bed, fb-ed my heart out and fell asleep...for the first time in i dont remember when, i slept uninterrupted for 8 hours!!!!



DAY 2

Woke up, the sun was shining in off the sea, i almost thought I was dreaming! I got up and went for a swim. The pool was perfect! I spent the rest of the day preparing for Larry to get here. I took a long bubble bath, falling asleep even, i felt like a bride preparing for her groom. I realized the 24 hours we spent apart was actually nice. It brought on much anticipation! I couldnt wait to see him and share this place with him!

Larry got here around 7. His plane was delayed in San Francisco. It was so fun seeing him show up all the way in Mexico! So romantic! I wont be writing about the rest of the evening:)

DAY 3

We went into San Jose and walked around the shops. We bought a Christmas ornament, a tradition we started on our honeymoon. We drove into Cabo San Lucas and went to Costco then stopped at MEGA the supermercado for a few more odds and ends where we almost signed up for one of those hotel tours. If you sign up they give you excursions and dinner cruises for free. When the guy was going over things, i had a panic attack! That has never happened to me before! I dont know why, but it was obvious we wernt supposed to go on this tour in Cabo San Lucas. so we went back to the hotel went for a walk on the beach, a swim in the pool and cooked up some steaks!

Day 4

We went for a walk on the beach, about 2 miles down. It's so cool watching the manterays jump! We also went to the other condo of Lloyd & Debbies at Tortuga Bay, it was unbelievably beautiful! Our minds were blown away! Now we're heading to The Hangmans for tacos. Darla & Barbara both tell me it's the best!!!

Day 5

Went in to Cabo and toured the Port of Cabo, shopped for the kids and had fish tacos. One of the highlights was a trio of guitar players who sang Spanish Eyes at our table. They were amazing and it was romantic. We had a few interesting moment too. One guy tried to sll us drugs, we saw a drug deal and a couple where the guy left the table and the gal was coming on to the waiter! The taxi ride home was CRAZY!!!!!! The guy drove so fast!!!! I was terrified!

Day 6

Ellen & Mark Johnston came over for dinner with their daughter Cynthia and her riend. They were staying in the condo next door! Kinda crazy! It was fun seeing friends from the USA in Mexico! We enjoyed their company and had a great evening.

Day 7

We took in the day! Savored every moment! We found a little pizza place tha tmade awesome pizza and enjoyed some good food.  Home tomorrow!

Day 8

We got all packed up and ready to go. We got gas in the car, stopped at a lookout and watched the surfers, then went to wash the car where a guy who worked there helped us. We were able to share the Lord with him, that was super cool!
Good bye Mexico, we enjoyed you immensely!

This is the short version, i wanted to write about everything, but those things are stored up in my heart. I may come back and fill in the blanks here, but for now, i will treasure them within myself. This trip was a trip of a lifetime! It is so far, my favorite memory of my entire marriage!

Sushi

I love sushi, it's an addiction really. I'm not so sure if it's the taste, the idea or just that i like little foods, but i am addicted for sure. If I get to thinking about it, I HAVE to have it!!! Because I am broke and can't afford to go as often as I would like, I decided to learn the art of sushi making. My 1st attempt at making a roll.... It turned out pretty good! I used white rice, avocado, cucumber, red onion and red pepper, topping it off with soy,pickled ginger and wasabi of course. Cameron says it was the best he's had. Well, he hasn't had amazing sushi before so he doesn't have much to go on, but never the less, it was a great compliment:) The great thing is that it cost me around $1.00 to make one roll where I would pay almost $10 for that amount at a sushi bar! So, hopefully I can master the art and become Jessica, Sushi Chef!!! to her friends and family!

Get Over It!

I am a serious "Get over it" kind of person, move on....live and learn....push forward...the past is the past....so it is hard for me to understand people who hang on to the past and allow it to dictate their life. Ya, I know our childhood life events shape us and mold us into who we are, and some people had it rougher than others and i'm sure rougher than me...so maybe I am being a bit harsh, but i am sharing from one perspective, mine:) OK< my childhood was interesting to say the least. I am thankful I wasn't physically or sexually abused,I know that brings on a lot of emotional damage that I cant relate to...well, maybe I can somewhat, my children were abused and i deal with their pain. But I am teaching them to not let it define them.  I had parents that always told me they loved me, they didn't get a divorce, although i wish they had at times.... there was no infidelity that i know of, but my childhood was far from easy!!! There were tough times to say the least! My dad was abusive to my mom, we were homeless at times, he was a gambler, he was gone a lot, my mom wasn't too fond of me for most of my life, she threw Christianity down our throats and made us terrified of God's wrath, (I call it the "Left Behind Movement") We didn't have much food, sometimes rotten food at best, I went to 17 schools from K-8th grade, we didn't have toilet paper, we washed our clothes in the bathtub, we always smelled like cigarettes....i can go on and on! But I have never let those things defeat me! I have taken from them and learned a lot about people and life. I have never been angry about how my life as a child was, I only gleaned form it. I knew at an early age what kind of mom i wanted to be, what kind of wife I would be and what kind of husband i wanted, & what kind of life i didn't want for myself and my kids. Even though the bas times outweighed the good, I took the good and share that with my family. My parents taught me how to cook and I teach my kids, we were always open to talk about whatever was on our minds, we were told daily, "I love you" , we knew Jesus loved us, there's more....and i took the best parts, even if few, and made them into the best parts of who I am today. I am not perfect, like my parents...and my children will have plenty of things they will toss out in the gleaning process...but I don't hang on to the tough times...i let them go...I haven't forgotten, but I don't let them dictate who I am. I know some of my actions stem from my childhood, like over-eating....but it doesn't define my character. So my hope for the hurting is to let it go! Jesus will carry it all for you, if you can just bag it up, hand it to Him and say, "Jesus, this is too much for me to carry, i don't want it, please will you take it from me?" He will! I promise!

Double Trouble

Pre-teens, oh boy! And twins at that! It has begun, the boobies are developing and so are the attitudes! I cant even begin to look ahead to the teen years! I have always wondered if I could parent girls. I am not a frilly girl, I don't like shopping, my nails are always broken, my hair has inches of grow out all the time, i dress in hand-me-downs, and my shoe collection consists of Vans and Converse. Boys are easy, I do a pretty good job raising boys...girls scare me! You can say something simple and it is interpreted so complex! Feelings are hurt just by a certain look you gave! You are depriving them of life if you don't like to go to the mall! And god forbid you say anything that remotely sounds like a comment about their body! It is a major put down to say, "Pull up your pants, your hiney is hanging out!" all they hear is, "Your butt is so fat it wont stay in your pants" haha Raising girls is tough! But I love it! My girls are good girls, I am very thankful for that! If we can survive the next 7 years together, i know we will be great friends!

Oatmeal

I love oatmeal.

What to do, what to do....

Every fibre of my being is fighting against the desire to expose something!

One gift I believe the Lord has given me is discernment. I have struggled greatly at times with this and am constantly having to re-evaluate myself becasue I want to make for certain that it's from the Lord and not my own thoughts. Over the years, God has shown me things through discerment and I have had to speak up on issues that are really hard. I know He gifts me with this becasue I am not afraid to speak out, however, when you are the one speaking out all the time, you tend to get a bit of a label for being a busy body or whistle blower, not a fan favorite! So, I guard myself more than I ever have. I pray for wisdom to go with discernment, the 2 go hand-in-hand! One without the other can be disasterous! I am not always the most eloquent at bringing things to the surface, but I always have good intentions when i do. So, this being said, I am praying for wisdom and opportunity and the Lords perfect timing, or a muzzle! No wonder i'm not sleeping! If you are thinking about it, please pray for me, or that the Lord brings it to surface w/o my help! That's always the easiest! haha, but not always His plan....

Stuffed Ronzoni Shells

This is something i put together today with ingredients i had in the house on my quest to make a cow fat low cal meal that made me feel like i was cheating! So this is what I came up with and it was delicious! So here's what i did....i dont measure things, but i'll guestimate...

3/4 a box of Ronzoni pasta shells

cook 'em up, rinse in cold water

mix up about....

1 1/2 c. ricotta cheese

1/4 c. grated parmesan

3 mushrooms, diced

1 1/2 c. fresh chopped spinach

3-4 dashes of Mediterranean seasoning

stuff shells with mixture

put in baking dish

pour Classico olive & mushroom marinara sauce over the top

top with shredded mozzarella

sprinkle with basil and black pepper

Bake @ 350* for 25 min, turn off oven and let sit until cheese is browned around the edges.

Makes 10 portions

120 calories

4.5 g fat

Use fat free ricotta and low fat part skim mozzarella and take it down to 2 g. fat and around 90 calories per serving. AMAZING!!!

Greatest Snack On Earth!

I think I amy have found the worlds best snack. I am so excited to share it with you! What I look for in a snack is satisfaction, this has major satisfaction! One of these babies has only 55 calories and 0 fat!

Here is is....drum roll please......

1 Quaker Lightly Salted Rice Cake

1 Tbs Emerald Valley Organic 3 Bean Dip

1 Tbs Fat Free Sour Cream

1 Tbs Emerald Valley Organic Salsa

Shredded iceburg lettuce (optional) (add 1 calorie with the lettuce)

Smear ricecake with beans, then sour cream, then salsa, top with shredds and there ya go!

You could even make it a lunch and eat 4 of them for only 200 calories and a full belly!

I love, love, love them and i hope you will try them and love them too:)

My Sous Chef

The day he made chicken with cloves and sticky overcooked top ramen for a side dish was the day that Larry was banned from my kitchen FOREVER!!! Very soon after that day 19 years ago, Cameron then 2 yrs old, became my sous chef. Once in a while Larry would poke his head in the kitchen and ask to help. I gave him menial tasks like opening cans and chopping things. On occasion, he would express how he could help me if i'd like, and knowing he was only offering because he wanted to be helpful, i replied the usual response, "Remember cloves and chicken!" and he would back out slowly, happy to be off the hook. Tonight I was making my famous chicken enchiladas for a friend who is ill and her family. I was so happy to make them because she requested them which boosted my food ego:) So, this is the story of tonight's cooking event. One that will surely replace the chicken and cloves going down into history in the Peterson, Martin-Peterson, Martin, Macedonio, Cervantes house.

Jessica doesn't have a car until 4 pm to purchase the ingredients for the meal and because she is a master procrastinator, she is left hurrying with Cameron through the market gathering her ingredients for the enchiladas. Chicken, sour cream, cheese, chili, green chiles, cream of chicken soup, tortillas, black beans and corn. She enters the house in a mad dash to prepare the meal in less than 30 min. She toasts the rice and forgets about it, before it can burn, Cameron tosses it and reminds her, she adds the spices and water and moves on forgetting to turn down the flame. As she de-bones the rotisserie chicken she asks sous chef Cameron to make the refried bean dish then realizes the flame for the rice needed to be turned down and she requests the help from Larry who is opening cans for her, to put the flame at 9 o'clock, he sets the flame, then stirs the rice...no!!! Cameron and Jessica both react. "Please dont stir the rice, it's going to be sticky now!" no big deal, it's just the rice. Jessica asks Larry to drain and rinse the black beans and corn and put them in the bowl she hands him. He does it. Then she asks him to put the soup, sour cream and chili in a bowl, as she looks over her shoulder she gasps, "wait!" her heart is pounding, she almost told him to put it in with the corn and chili which goes in with the chicken and green chilis for the filling. The other stuff is the sauce. " Oh man, i'm so glad i didnt have him do that, i think i would have cried! That would just be the worse thing ever! pfew!" she gives him a different bowl for the sauce stuff. The chicken is de-boned and everything is ready to be put together! Jessica turns around to get the 2 bowls and "FUCK!" is all that came out of her mouth! There it was...1 bowl with all of the ingredients...he was standing there mixing it all up, his smile turned to an expression of, "What did I just do" there was no going back, the enchiladas were going to be soupy creamy enchiladas. With no time to re-do, they were put together, topped with a verde enchilada sauce and cheese, put in the oven and baked, but not before Jessica put one on a plate for Larry. As he ate the enchilada he soon realized his tortilla was swimming in sauce and he didnt want to finish it. Then he asked "Did you forget to put the chicken in here?" No, it's in there....she sends him on his way to her friends house accompanied by a note that read, "Dear sweet friend, please enjoy these soupy creamy enchiladas. They were made with love." or something like that;O)

REJECTION? NAW!

I have learned more about myself these past three years than I ever have in my life. I know people think I'm kinda nuts auditioning for The Biggest Loser so many times ( 8 ) just to be rejected. I've come close! but no cigar! But I don't feel rejected one bit! This is how I look at it and why I continue to try....

1- Going through the process, answering a bazillion questions about me has given me an opportunity to get to know myself. It has caused me to reflect on my life, giving me a chance to put myself in the forethought's of my mind. If you are a mom, you know how rare that can be!

2. I have met some amazing people and some who will be lifelong friends!

3. My cousin Sandy and I are closer than ever doing this thing together!

4. It has inspired me to try! To eat healthier and start moving! After every season i say, "I will not be fat enough for the next season!" Although I am, I have lost over 35# since I started auditioning!

5. I got to go to LA to the live taping of the season 11 finale and meet tons of Losers and Casting Directors and cool people! I had an hour long convo with Allison Sweeney's husband Dave who is a crack up and invited me to their house for a BBQ next time I'm in town! How fun is that! I think i made him laugh a little...go figure!

6. I don't do too many things for myself...the BL has been something that I've done for ME and it kinda feels good! I've enjoyed the auditions and the travel and the time spent on improving my looks...it actually has made me care about what I look like!

7. I have never let people take my picture and I am always the one behind the camera in home videos. Doing so many videos has made me realize that I need to be a part of the documentation of our family! So now I am not afraid to be on camera or have my pic taken. Bearing my rolls to the nation has me more comfortable with my self image!

I will continue to try to get on the show. You don't make it as far as I have to just give up! So as long as I am fat enough, there's still a chance! I hope this season I get the chance to go to LA and show them in person why they need me on the show!

I think having the Biggest Loser as a platform, I could make a difference in so many peoples lives! And winning the cash, I could start my dream business with Larry! And being a part of something so amazing would rock my world! And getting fit would be such a huge deal! Not only could i fulfill my dream of running marathons, but getting out there with my family, participating in my life would be amazing! And you know i would win the whole damn thing!

So, if I don't get on the show, please know this...I am not giving up on myself. I will continue to make changes and fight for my life back. I have never been sad or felt rejected by not getting on. I completely understand & trust the casting process and trust God that if I am supposed to be on the show, I will be.

11.5 Years of Children's Ministry, serving with dozens of amazing people, loving hundred's of beautiful children, we are retiring after this Sunday. We have served hundred's of kids over the years and think of it as a true blessing! It's been real, it's been fun and it's been real fun!!!!

My Christmas Letter

Me at Christmas: I love Christmas, I really do! I'm not one of those people who is hyper sensitive about the whole "Happy Holiday's" and I'm not a die hard Black Friday shopping, tree up, lights hung, every ones getting 25 gifts, psycho Christmas person. I'm not someone who says the family is going to do home-made gifts this year and donate all of our toys to the needy....although that's not too far off, haha....I don't write a Christmas letter, but I love having my friend read me her mother-in-laws (best letters ever) and I look forward to my Aunt Margaret's letter each year. I rarely give out Christmas cards, the last one was an Andy Warhol style pic of the whole family making thug faces saying, "Merry Freaking Christmas" and I am not kidding...I gave out 13. I surely am not someone who loves to receive gifts, just the thought of a gift is wonderful to me, i would prefer people give me a card and write in what they would have got me if i liked gifts. This is me at Christmas: Instead of buying my family gifts, I buy a gaggle of geese or a goat or fishing equipment for a family in a 3rd world country in their name. What do people who can afford a good life possibly need form me? I can give a 5$ gift to everyone, or i can make a difference in someones life! ( www.heifer.org )

We love to dress up like Santa and go to friends houses. It's the highlight of our Holiday! Larry and I are the Clause's and the kids are elves, it's so much fun! I've been trying to get Cameron to be Rudolph, but so far he's only been Ebenezer Scrooge!

The past few years we've stayed home for Christmas, ditching our families and relaxing. It's nice to have a quiet at home Christmas for the first time in 18 yrs. We don't like to rush opening gifts, (and we don't do many gifts, only 1 maybe 2) I make a pot of clam chowder on Christmas Eve, a little shrimp cocktail and a glass of wine. Ahhhh, sounds good right now:) The kids entertain us with playing their horns and singing carols, Cameron plays his guitar and sings a few contemporary hits, Larry and I hum along... Christmas morning we have brunch, the kids have their stockings and we have another day of relaxing together as a family, all the while remembering the true meaning we've imposed on Christmas, JESUS! This year we'll be going to my sister Carrie's house in Tri-Cities, she likes it calm and quiet like me:) But we wont leave before Santa makes his rounds! Merry Christmas and I hope you all have Christmas your way.

A toupee in the tub

There was so much hair in the drain this morning when i went to take a shower that it could have been worn. As i removed the clump of drenched black hair, gagging, i was irritated at the black haired people in my house. (thats everyone in my family except for me & Cam and he doesnt use that shower) "How lazy can people be to not remove their hair from the drain screen! How inconsiderate!" I grumbled. Then I realized i was sweating the small stuff again....grrrr...me and the small stuff!

Now, I am a different kind of person, I realize for some people it takes awhile for the to "get" me but when they do, i think they like me for the most part...then there are people who like me right off...i know i have this huge personality and i say the things people might think but wold never verbalize...but all-in-all, i think people like me..I'm fairly easy going, i love diversity, im not judgemental, I'm not click-ish or exclusive in any way, i see the gifts and talents people have and appreciate them for who they are...but the thing i pride myself on the most is I am considerate. Your laughter can be heard from here! I know some might say i am not so considerate of feelings all the time because i tell it like it is....but really i am..just because i am brutally honest most of the time, i do consider emotions and i try to be as considerate as i can muster....but what i am extremely considerate of is the little things....here are a list of things that make me feel like people are not considerate...i may come back and revamp the list a few times, but this is all off the top of my head as i think about the hair in the tub....

These are petty, i know and i am trying not to sweat them...but i may be swimming in sweat with a few a time or two...here ya go, my "Small Stuff" list...

1. Hair left in the tub (I am so sicked out by peoples hair that i dont feel so clean after the shower!)

2. Leaving the shower curtain open (the last thing i need is a reminder that it's time to clean the tub, or have someone stop by and when they use the toilet they see that its over due for the shower to be cleaned, besides, it just looks sloppy when its left open)

3. Leaving the toilet seat down at night (I cant tell you how many times ive peed all over the top of the lid in the middle of the night)

4. Eating with mouth open or smacking food (Seriously so annoying and sick, learn some manners)

5. Sock stash (My husband and kids (not Cam) literally stash their socks in corners, under chairs and sofas, under the bed etc...hello! it takes more effort to stash them that it does toss them in the laundry!)

6. Peanut butter on knife or spoon in sink (PB doesnt wash off easily and it cooks on in the dishwasher, cant you grab a napkin or rag and wipe off the utensil? then, please put the dirty rag in the laundry so i dont smear PB all over the counter when i grab it to wipe up something)

7. Greasy fingers/unwashed hands (use a napkin Larry!)

8. Water splashed in front of sink (I lean over to get to the faucet and becasue of my fat in the front, i soak up the water!)

9. Toothpaste splatter (really? ya cant make it into the sink and rinse it down? or ya just walk away w/o cleaning up after yourself? and how on earth does it get on the mirror?)

10. Two tsp of milk left in the jug (wow, thanks for leaving some for the next person, howgenerous! I'm so glad you put it back in the fridge so my eyes could deceive me and make me think we had milk!)

11. Pretending to listen. (I just had a 20 min one sided convo and you say, "What was that?)

arg, i'm tired...i'll finish up later...haha, isnt it inconsiderate of me to leave a blog post in the middle of writing....ha!

Happy Birthday Brother

Halloween has been re-named Donnieween in our house. It's Donnies Birthday on Halloween. I miss him soooo much. I was blown away today thinking he would be 43! It's been 10 yrs since he was killed and i can hardly believe it. I tell you, in the best brother category, he was a winner! Sheesh, i miss him so much! So all day yesterday, i was thinking about Halloween over the years. We always had a special meal for our b-day and Donnie always picked something like chili dogs or beef stew...then we would have jello cake with cool whip on top. Donnie always had the best b-day because trick-or-treating was his party! A costume party every year! (I never got a party...boooo) We would take our pillowcase out and fill it up! My dad would be waiting with his empty coffee can to fill up from out loot! I hated that!

As we got older, into high school, all the kids would come over and we'd get ready to go out to a party, telling my mom we were going to the Elks lodge...then all the kids would stumble home with us and crash. The next morning my mom would make everyone sit at the table for Bible study. She would say, "I can smell booze all over you kids, you cant fool me!" Why on earth were we allowed to go the next year? then, as adults, we would go to the local lounge and go dancing. Donnie loved to dance. We boogied down until the place closed. Halloween will always be Donnieween!Happy Birthday Brother!

Sad TV

Lately i've been watching a lot of TV programing on Netflix. Call it the "pre-winter blues" or maybe, "awwww, summers over...i think i'll take a month off" none the less, as much as i am enjoying the programs, i am sad:( "Why are you sad?" Oh, thanks for asking! Because the majority of these shows have been cancelled! Just when i get attached...in comes some hatch job of a finale and bloop!, gone! just like that! I'm trying to figure out a way i can get in touch with the characters in the shows and maintain a relationship with them...no, not really...i'm not crazy! welll.....anyway, some great shows out there getting cancelled and even though i am happy to have them as an extended mini-series, i am perplexed as to why only 2 seasons????? I guess there must be more people like me out in TV land...I hardly watch TV....so i figure it must be low ratings??? I dunno....but they sure have given me a month of relaxation! So-far I've been hooked on Eli Stone, Psych, Samantha Who?, and Life Unexpected...finished them all:) I dont know if that's good or bad, that's a lot of TV! More than i've watched since my days of Soap Operas (Days & Passions fan here...still watch Days because i have for 35 yrs but it only takes once every 3 months to get caught up on who Sammy has offed) and The Cosby Show! So, if you have any other prolonged mini-series for me, i am up for suggestions, it's going to be a looooong winter!

Crappy food for kids

The USDA food program is a pile of bull shit! I want to get this weight off so I can speak up and try to make a change in the school lunch program! I rely on the free lunch program and i feel guilty becasue i know my kids are eating total crap! Burritos, burgers, corn dogs, chicken nuggets, chocolate milk! No wonder there's such an obesity epidemic in the USA! I cant say much right now being i am overweight, lets be real, people will not listen to me if i look this way, they will only assume i eat horribly!

Poop

I'm unsure why, but I am fascinated with poop! I think poop is important, and poop is funny! It's fun to talk about poop with people. I love a good poop story! I think poop is hilarious!

Poop is also important becasue it tells us how our health is doing...we can tell a lot about the color and texture of our poop. The funniest poop I ever had was a bright turquoise and brown (so trendy!) log. I had eaten a box of fruity pebbles the day before, (yes, i ate the whole box, breakfast lunch and dinner...oh what i would do for some right now! I'm down 18# by the way...no more fruitie pebbles in my future!) I know when my body is malfunctioning when my poop is off....for instance, when i have a lot of yellow in my poop, that tells me i have a bit of a blockage in my liver, i need to eat some apples! Or if its white, i have a serious blockage and need to go to the doctor and have my gal bladder removed! Have you ever looked at your turd after eating a bunch of carrots? LOL

If oyu have a good poop story, feel free to share it with me! And if you are at my house and need to poop, dont worry, i do have boundaries believe itor not, I wont talk about your poop! (well, depending on who you are!)

soooo close to the BL

To get soooo close and not make it on the reality TV show The Biggest Loser was an honor! Honestly, I didnt feel the type of disapointment you would think i might feel...seriously, i was a little bummed and wondered how i was going to take control over my life and do it on my own...but when i gave it some thought i realized i made it past signing a contract! Out of a half million people wanting to get on this show, i amde it to the top! That is an honor!

I do wonder, "Why?????" What was it that made them change their minds? When I got a phone call from one of the casting directors saying to expect the phone call and e-mail with itenirary and see ya in LA to get an e-mail saying we werent selected the next day, i was a little shocked! But I have to trust the process...when that season comes out it'll probably shed light on the why??? or maybe not...however....one thing is for sure, I trust the Lord and the plans He has for my life are perfect!

blooooooog

I struggle with writing a blog becasue usually everything i have to say are the things i want to vent and the things i want to vent are the things people find offensive so what is a blog for? That was retorical..... save your comments....

My personality!

I am someone who is probably an over communicator most of the time...what I mean by that is, I share too many of my thoughts and feelings, sometimes more than i should...but for the most part, I think its a good thing...so that gets me looking around and noticing that a lot of people hold things in and let it fester! I am definitly not willing to let things fester! The word fester makes me throw up a lil in my mouth! Conflict resolution is a must have in my life! I love to work things out no matter how hard and get along with people! But once in a while you get that person that just cant let go so no matter what you do to try and resolve things, they hang on and cant let go..in that case, i just pray.....

Having a comanding personality, I find it easy to speak my mind and say the things i think outloud! I feel no discomfort whatsoever in sharing my views, thoughts and feelings. Once I have formed an opinion, I feel the need to share it with people! And clarity is a must for me! I need to be forthright and also challenge others to be like minded, I want to hear what they have to say! Although I tend to be a bit intimidating, and others might feel a bit nervous to share, for fear they may not like my response...i try to go easy and have good boundaries, but that isnt always what ends up happening...I am taken the wrong way at times and i understand why...so i try to show that person, sometimes over time, that i am harmless...however, if they want to jump into a non offensive, very opinionated debate, bring it on! i love it! but only if i can say whatever i want and the other person knows not to take it personal...I value peoples opinions and love hearing their way of thinking and have them challenge mine!

So all that being said, becasue I am the way I am...people tend to think I rule over my household and control my family...that is so not true! People tend to think of Larry as a soft spoken, meek, mild man...that is a misjudge! He is definitly the leader of our home and I fully respect him and take comfort in knowing I can trust that he is making good decisions for our family. The fact that he puts up with me and enjoys my boldness...and allows me to be me makes him a great leader!

I am who I am and I like who I am.

Hangin' out

Just sitting in the livingroom hanging out with the fam...everyone's doing their own thing...the kids are playing their DS sitting right next to me, quietly chatting about their games, Larry's reading a book sitting across from me and of course i'm on my computer...Cameron is milling around the kitchen getting ready to come in with his afternoon snack.

It just hit me that even though we are all doing different things and there is only small talk between us all, we are all together spending time. We could be doing this in different rooms of the house and we would be separate from one another, but instead, we are just enjoing being in the same room...I like it!

40 A'las

I feel 40, oh so 40, it's adoring how 40 I feel.......adapted form My Fair Lady, "I feel Pretty" haha

So 40 is here and I can now say it proudly, I'm 40!

cheese

I love cheese

i was in the check-out at Costco and the cashier said, "You must have a deli?" I asked why he thought that and he said, "Well you have 11 different types of cheese here and with your business Costco account, i just assumed..." I said my card is though my father-in-law and that i just love cheese, He replied, "I see that" so i teased him a little saying "Oh really, you think i'm fat from cheese huh? thats nice" Awkwardly he back tracked, stumbling over his words...i didnt let him sink for too long... I let him in on my funky sense of humor...it was all good:) so here's my cheese list that day, i love cheese...

string cheese

cheddar/jack shredded

cheddar cheese block

vintage white block

cream cheese

feta

parmesan

laughing cow

muenster

mozzarella balls

gorgonzola

BL 11 Finale

So, I got an invite from a friend I met through the auditioning process the past 2 years for The Biggest Loser, Stephenie, who has auditioned several times and is now the blogger for the BL Protein bars. Anywho, she knew all the effort I have put into getting on the show and invited me to go with her to LA and be a part of the Live Finale! So thanks to my friends B & D and my son, I was able to fly down to LA and stay in the Universal Studios Sheridan Hotel with all past and present BLers!

Day 1: I got to the hotel around 11 am, got settled in my room and went down to the lobby to meet up with the owners of "Shut Up & Sweat" (shutupandsweat.com) Mike and Nancy Dudley, who I fb-ed earlier in the week to see if they would bring me a t-shirt to have signed by the BLers...because I have seen the BLers and Jillian and casting directors for the show wear their gear. They were happy to bring me one and invited us to hang out with them. So to my surprise, they brought us a bag full of T's and hoodies! COOL!!! Not only did we get to hang with them, but they introduced us to ALL the BL people!!! They are people making a difference for kids, I have a ton of respect for what they are doing!

Then we went over to the Universal Studios City walk and ate at the Hard Rock Cafe.

Then back tot he hotel for the "Before Finale Party" Where I hung out with the Losers and their families...it was really cool!

Day 2: Finale Day!!! We walked over to Subway where in LA, if you want it your way, you take the risk of getting knifed! Then spent the rest of the morning and early after-noon getting dolled up for the finale....took a taxi over to the NBC Studios, waited outside for our turn to get in, (about an hour 1/2) and chatted it up with all sorts of past season Losers, all the way back to season 1! (my fav season...it was actually 'reality') (i think) so then off to our seats...we had separate seating, hmmmm..I dont know why...but i got some good executive seats! Then the taping of the show...the live part was cool...I got on TV, that was what I wanted, so I was happy! then back tot he hotel....to the After Finale Party!!!! So much fun!!!! I got to meet Alison Sweeny and her hilarious husband, Brett & Cara, and tons of Losers, and casting directors, most whom I knew already, so that was fun to just be there! They were pretty shocked! This went on until 3 AM...It was magical! I learned so much both nights and realized, I dont want to be on the show! I am SO serious!

Day 3: Packed up, checked bags, visited with Courtney Crozier from season 11 and headed to the airport! It was a whirlwind of reality TV craziness! Too many details to write about!!! But I may come back and add to this post with some stories, but right now, my legs are on fire! This computer needs to cool off! LATER!

Soup Frenzy!!!

Soup is divine. I am a soup-a-holic! I love it so much, I make it a few times a week. It's just so hearty and makes you feel so loved! I can remember the feeling I had when my mom would make soup. I really loved the time and effort she put into her chicken noodle soup. It was so delicious and hearty! I remember thinking I was going to make soup for my kids, and I do:)

Right now, for breakfast, I am enjoying a vegetable soup (leftover form a meeting Saturday night) I raided my fridge and it turned out great! I really enjoy making "Refrigerator Soup" or "Pantry Soup" This time, I had some great veggies in the frige, so it was hearty and delicious! Here's the recipe:

Dice all veggies (I use about 1/4 cup of each except for carrots and celery I use 1/2 c. celery and tons of carrots)

Onion

Celery

Red Pepper

Carrots

Patty Pan Squash

Purple Potato (or any kind)

Yellow Squash

Zucchini

Eggplant

Kale

Asparagus

Peas

a big handful of ABC pasta

1 can petit diced tomatoes

1 tbs pesto

2-3 tbs tomato bouillon

salt to taste

boil everything except pasta on a low boil for an hour or so, add pasta and continue until pasta is done.

I love cream soups and chowders & clear soups....all of them! I love them!

If you have a recipe you want to share and add to my soup lst, I would love it!!!!!

WHAT ARE WE FEEDING OUR KIDS?

I asked my girls what they were having for breakfast this morning and they looked at each other with a smile...they knew i was expecting them to say "Cheerios" so i asked again and they said, "turnovers, but mom, they are sooo good! We have to have one! They're filled with strawberries or apples!" "That is not fruit when it's in that form and you have a junk food lunch for your field trip" I said...We all know what they will be having for breakfast anyway! Turnovers for school breakfast???? ug.

That's it people, I am going to figure something out here and start advocating for our kids! It's been on my mind ever since Jamie Oliver came out with the Food Revolution show, and it's really nagging me!

I rely on school lunch! It helps so much with our budget because our kids get free breakfast and lunch. There are choices that are good...but temptations I cant really expect my kids to say no to! I think they do for the most part, but really, i couldnt have when i was a kid, especially if my mom didnt give me junk very often. Which she really didn't, so I am sure i chugged down all the chocolate milk i could and ate everything on the menu that wasn't good for me! and look at me now!

If we dont try, change wont happen! I am going to do something, even if they don't make the changes, at least they know there's someone who sees and cares! Maybe it'll plant a seed, I don't know, but I do know that Child obesity is on the rise! I know that I raised an obese child! And I know I need to stand up for change! Maybe this will help me in my own journey with getting healthy.

I will say that there is a healthy choice on the menu every day. The can have a sub sandwich with lettuce or whatever else is on the salad bar. If they take off the nasty processed cheese and dont put the mayo on it, and fill it with veggies...it's a great lunch. I think they use whole wheat bread too...but expecting my kids to eat that every day is unrealistic! I know they wont...I would have to go to the school and make sure....and that is unrealistic too...and the chocolate milk, oh my gosh! Chocolate milk has more sugar that pop! At least with pop, there's no fat! I dont let my kids drink pop...maybe once in a while, but not often...but they were drinking chocolate milk every day until last year. I let them have it on Fridays and I hope they are being honest about it! But who knows!

from US New:

Schools, for example, play a paramount role in teaching kids lifestyle choices. Yet more than 70 percent allow kids to buy high-fat, salty, and sugared foods during lunch, and some 20 percent offer brand-name fast food as part of the USDA-supported school lunch or sell it a la carte. Hamburgers, hot dogs, pizza, and french fries are standard school fare. Few schools provide salad bars, in part because USDA reimbursement covers only one vegetable per meal. And 50 percent of middle schools and 70 percent of high schools have contracts with soft-drink companies to market sodas on campus. By age 14, 32 percent of girls and 52 percent of boys drink three or more 8-ounce soft-drink servings daily. Few kids meet guidelines for fruits and vegetables, yet they are eating more calories than their parents did as kids--243 more for boys and 123 more for girls. They're also moving less: Only 8 percent of elementary schools, 6.4 percent of junior highs, and 5.8 percent of high schools offer daily physical education.

Schools wonder why kids are so hyper and unruly....they are allowing the crap food in school but aren't eliminating one of the biggest causes. There have been kids put on medications for their behavior only to find it was diet....and they are off and doing perfectly great! What are we doing to our kids!!!???

Food dyes are chemicals & are the cause of a lot of behavioral problems too. We need to READ LABELS!

All of my 4 kids are reactive to food dyes and I bet yours are too! Meth is a chemical drug that we are all familiar with....food dyes are like giving our kids meth in small doses...and our kids are addicted to it!

I am guilty of feeding my kids mac-n-cheese form the box, but i always read the label! COSTCO has mac-n-cheese Kirkland brand, that is made form whole wheat pasta, and has no artificial coloring that looks and tastes just like any other box mac-n-cheese! Or Jar spaghetti sauce, buy Ragu...all ingredients are natural or naturally derived! You dont have to make homemade everything to eliminate these food dyes.

Lets talk about margarine...one molecule away from plastic!!! What are we doing to ourselves! But more importantly, our children!!!!

The following statements are form the FD&C:

The food dye that's generated the most controversy is Yellow Dye #5, Tatrazine. Yellow 5 has been demonstrated to provoke an allergic reaction in some people and there are FDA regulations that require all prescription medications to post a notice if they are formulated with Yellow 5.

The proper chemical name for Red40 is:
6-hydroxy-5-[(2-methoxy-5-methyl-4-sulfophenyl)azo]-2-naphthalenesulfonic acid
which is a terribly long word for a very tiny molecule. The chemical is often referred to as an "azo" dye.

and Red2 is a cancer causing agent...lab rats came down with cancer! arent we lucky the government has decided to ban it and companies are in the process of eliminating it?

Google food dyes and you will be blown away with what you learn!!!!

What do strawberry Jello, orange Koolaid, raspberry soda, grape popsicles, much candy and baked goods, most brands of ice cream, maraschino cherries, many snack foods, and most pet food have in common? They are laced with millions of pounds of artificial coal-tar based dyes with names such as Red 3, Blue 1, Blue 2, Green 3, Yellow 5, Yellow 6, and Red 40. Each year, Americans eat (as food dyes), swallow (as pill coatings or medicinal syrups) or rub on themselves (as cosmetics) 6.4 million pounds of these 7 dyes, mostly in food. Four of these food dyes (Red 3, Yellow 5, Yellow 6, and Blue 2) which make up over half of the food dyes used each year have been shown to cause cancer as have other dyes which are not used in food but are used in drugs or cosmetics.

Public Citizen Health Research Group,

Saturday

I went to Saturday Market with Cameron today. I ate some fired up Uzbekastanian food and Cameron ate homemade bread and sugar free jam. We sat in the park and Cam played his guitar, the sun finally decided to stay for a day and we were enjoying the atmosphere of downtown, which we both love. As I looked around though, I couldn't believe how many people were allowing their dogs to piss all over garbage cans and leave their piles of crap in the grass! I was looking for poop stations or signs, didn't see any...but really? c'mon people, you need to bring a pooper scooper or bag to remove your dogs crap from the area where people lounge in the grass, their kids play and roll around...be responsible or leave your dog home! Besides, dogs dont like to be hauled out into public! Get real, and not everyone is a dog person! I honestly cant stand it when people let their dogs come right up to me as if i was for sure a freaking dog lover...which i am not...then we walk past a guy wanting us to sign a petition to not allow illegals get their drivers license in the Sate of WA...ya, in the state where the legal limit is liability, i want a bunch of unlicensed, uninsured drivers on the street! I'll make sure i keep my full coverage! I said, "Sorry dude, the DMV isnt going to keep illegals out and from driving!"

I love diversity, I love Uzbekastanian food, i love the sunshine and time with my big boy, but not the people with their dogs! I did not enjoy that!

The Prayer of Jabez

And Jabez called on the God of Israel saying, “Oh, that You would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evil, that I may not cause pain!” So God granted him what he requested. 1 Chronicles 4:10

Lord, bless me today indeed! Give me work to do for You today! Help me to not be sinful or cause others to hurt, protect me form evil! Amen!

I try to pray this prayer every day. Sometimes I forget and I dont know why because it is true that whenever I pray it, I am blessed! The blessings are always amazing! Sometimes it's a word of wisdom from the Lord that I can share to help someone, sometimes it;s a dream or vision, sometimes its He shows me someone is pregnant, sometimes it;s a financial blessing or a gift...it's always something special and I love the blessings of the Lord! He wants to bless us! He wants us to ask Him for gifts and Blessings! I encourage you to pray this prayer with me and share with people what blessings the Lord has bestowed upon you! I promise, it works! God has SO many gifts he wants to give us, yet we dont ask...start asking! See wht gifts the Lord wants to give you!

March 24th

One blessing today I received was from Cameron's Oral Surgeon. They called out of the blue and lovingly gave us a 50% discount on his up-coming surgery! I have saved 800$ for the surgery but needed to come up with 800$ more. I was unsure how that was going to happen, but God took care of that! Our total bill will be 750$ What a blessing!

not saying anything at all

just taking my mom's advice

nuts

i love nuts...all kinds of nuts..crunchy, salty delicious nuts! They make such a delicious snack. Just by themselves or as a topping on salads, desserts...whatever! I am impressed with nuts...seeds are great too...love seeds...thank you God for nuts...and seeds!!!!

Forfar Bridies

Finding out this 2-3 past years that both my parents had different biological fathers was like..."oh, sorry, but your dad is still your dad, he loved you and raised you" then the realization came that everything i thought i was wasn't what i thought! (nationality speaking) All my life I thought I was Norwegian on my maternal grandfathers side, my Grandpa Olson was a great ol' guy who was 100% Norwegian. He made good fish and good pasties and nasty lutefisk! He was a steeplechase and a war hero who loved to go fishing. My paternal grand-dad Jess is who I am named after. He died of a heart attack when I was 3. I dont remember him. He was mostly Flat Head Indian. I always loved my Native American heritage and proclaimed it proudly! So, this kinda through me through a loop! I mean, obviously I know who I am and my family is my family, but I really wanted to know what make-up I am! So, after thinking I was mostly Scottish, Irish, Dutch and Sweetish last year..we (my sis and I) did some research to find the Scottish line goes deeper than anything...we are probably 50% Scottish if not more! And, we discovered the great grandpa no one ever spoke of...well, he's Mexican, grand-dad Fernando! That was exciting to me! I have a real connection with that culture especially because our 3 adopted kids are Mexican:)

So, it's no longer pasties, it's forfar bridies! (same thing) I am excited to learn more about the other branches of Scottish ancestry. I think I should go out and get Cameron a kilt! After all, he's Irish and Scottish all the more being it's heavy on both sides!

So, i'll break out the scottish whisky (ya right) and make a scottish toast to you...

Alba gu brath! Go mbeannaí Dia duit A h-uile la sona, dhuibh 's gun la idir dona dhuibh!

Scottland Forever! May God bless you! May all your days be happy ones!

Self Control

I'm not sure of what to blog about these day...i've got a lot on my mind but not sure if it's appropriate to blog about..i have always thought of blogging as being able to write whatever i wanted because it's my blog, but i was reminded that i need to remember who i represent (Jesus) and if people are reading this, well, you get the picture....it's hard being an ambassador of Christ when I still have worldly thoughts and feelings...then i want to get them out and it ends up turning into an ugly blog....so i'm going to work at blogging a little differently...vent my thoughts and feeling but share what the Lord has taught me or something like that...I guess self control is a gift i should be praying for it!

The Big 4-0

I am totally looking forward to turning 40 in June! I know people kinda freak out about it, but I think it's going to be great year and I feel honored almost to be in the 40 bracket! I hated the 20's and was embarrassed due to the fact that most people in my age group were total idiots , my 30's i've felt like I am, and have been waiting for something big to happen, and I think 40 those big things are gonna happen! I feel like i'll be a "real" adult! Wiser, more confident, more distinguished...maybe....and looking forward to grand-kids...time with friends spent without little kids running around our ankles...having some life lessons under my belt to give advice to my friends in their 30's....having better sex....enjoying the relationship i have with my parents as they get older because they know very soon i'll be the one taking care of them so they treat me a whole lot better.....so many reasons...
All the 40-Blues people have going on, they should stop wasting their time and embrace their 40's and realize that 40 is just beginning to LIVE! so, I am stoked to be 40~
SO_ any of my over 40 friends and followers...please comment on what you like about being over 40 and give me more to look forward to:)

Koo-Koo-Kachoo!

Koo-koo-kachoo to you all!

I was thinking of summer as I sit in all this damn rain...and the thoughts of summer salads are turning in my brain as if on a lazy susan. This one in particular makes my mouth water...chick-pea salad with fresh torn basil, vine ripened summer tomatoes, sweet white onions sliced into tiny strips, dices of cucumber fresh from the garden, and fresh squeezed lemon juice to add flavor explosion to a mix of deliciousness! then....stuffed into a toasted pita smeared with roasted red pepper hummus and topped with fresh crunchy alfalfa sprouts....ahhhh....June, hurry your ass up!

I continually lie to you about keeping up on my blog...i suck

There are some questions my friend had on her blog. She thought it would be cool if people answered them on their blog...I thought that was a nifty idea, thanks Karen...I love your blog...I think it should be famous:)

on my nightstand:
A lamp
A Nintendo DS
A wadded up over-used tissue
A half drank bottle of water
Some loose change, gum wrapper and a paperclip (from Larry's pockets)
A tray of girlie scents

am loving:

Homemade soups
Not having grass to mow

how does winter inspire you?

still thinking

whats one item in your winter wardrobe you can't go without?

My hooded cape

whats your idea of the perfect homemade winter meal?

Homemade soup with rustic bread and hard butter

What are three constants in your day?

Getting kids off to school
enjoying a quiet afternoon
cooking a warm comfort meal for my family

What is your winter theme song this year?

Baby it's cold outside

I am hoping to win the lottery on Thanksgiving...i've been praying...after tax's it would be about 500K..enough to change our life! Please Lord...give me a treat:) let me win

Healed by the Great Physician

My mom was healed from cancer.

After going through a double mastectomy and finding more cancer in her lymph nodes and another tumor on her chest, doctors immediately started chemo. Her test results showed a 87% mortality rate for her cancer. not good...not good at all! through it all my mom stood firm that the Lord was going to heal her and she wouldn't have to have chemo. The day the chemo started she called me and said she had to admit she was a little disappointed but that she knew even still the Lord was going to heal her. a week later she went back for her chemo treatment and the doctor came in and her jaw was dropped! the results were back and the mortality rate was now zero and every # on the paper was zero! Her cancer was gone and there was no explanation! The doctors said they didn't know what to make of it, they had never seen anything like it...but my mom said, "Let me tell you, I have the explanation" and there she shared with everyone in the room what Jesus has done! Long story short here....I may write more about it later..but the bottom line is...Jesus is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow...God is so good and so loving and so amazing! I thank him for this healing and love seeing my moms faith! She is such a witness to my life! She is such a great mom <3